* A joke's a very serious thing. (Charles Churchill)
* It is difficult to fashion a jest with a sad mind. (Tibullus)
* A good laugh is better than a good cry. (Motto)
* Anyone who takes himself too seriously always runs the risk of looking ridiculous;
   anyone who can consistently laugh at himself does not. (Vaclar Havel)
* People who laugh actually live longer than those who don't laugh.
* Few persons realize that health actually varies according to the amount of laughter.

"Sir, what is the secret of your success?"
a reporter asked a bank president.
"Two words"
"And, Sir, what are they?"
"Right decisions."
"And how do you make right decisions?"
"One word."
"And, what is that?"
"And how do you get experience?"
"Two words."
"And, Sir, what are they?"
"Wrong decisions."

Seen on a restroom wall:

"God is dead"

"Nietzche is dead"

"Did you hear that George Berkeley died? His girlfriend stopped seeing him."
(Overheard in 18th century England)

I ran into Jim at work yesterday. He had been out for a few days with the flu. I asked him how he was feeling.
"I'm better, thanks. You know, it was a wonderful experience." he replied.
"Wonderful? How can the flu be wonderful?" I asked in stunned disbelieves.
"Well, I learned that my wife really loves me. You know that when ever the mailman came by or a delevery man headed toward the door, my wife ran out to meet them? I could hear her excitedly saying "My husband is home! My husband is home!"

This really old guy is walking on the beach one day.
He hears a little teenie tiny voice calling out "Hey Mister...pssst...come here." He looks around and sees a little tiny frog under a palm tree. He picks it up and it says "Hey Mister...if you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful young woman and your wishes will be my commands forever."
He takes the frog, puts it in his pocket,and starts to walk back toward home.
The frog says "Hey, what are ya doing? Don't ya want to kiss me?"
The old man says, "No... to tell you the truth, at my age, a talking frog worths whole lot more to me."

An old lady, who lived on the third floor of a boardinghouse, broke her leg. As the doctor put a cast on it, he warned her not to climb any stairs. Several months later, the doctor took off the cast.
"Can I climb stairs now?" asked the little old lady.
"Yes," he replied.
"Thank goodness!" she said. "I'm sick and tired of shinying up and down that drainpipe!"

"Darn," said an ardent young man, reading a letter. His friend, standing near him, said "Bad new?" "Disturbing news, anyway," said the young man "It's from someone who say away from his wife, he'll kill me."
"In this case, if were you, I would stay away from his wife."
"Gladly, but which one? The letter is anonymous."